Difference between Single Mom and Married Mom
Everyone says that motherhood is the hardest job there is. If this is true, shouldn't it be easier if you are a married mom? Not necessarily if you ask the moms! Single moms and married moms both have a difficult job to do regardless of marital status. Twenty years ago, it was unheard of to consider raising a family alone by choice. These days it as extremely common to see single mothers in all walks of life. No longer is it a "requirement" to be married before having children.
Money factors
Single moms have had a history of money problems and struggles due to one income and unreliable support systems. While this can be true even in recent times, more and more single moms are in existence than ever before from choice. Unmarried women who waited until their 30s or later to start a family are realizing they can have a family without having a husband. Non-traditional families are becoming the norm these days as successful, professional women are having babies at almost the same rate as married women.
Married moms traditionally have had less money problems due to the additional income of their husband. Even stay-at-home moms had less of a struggle due to the historically large income gap between men and women. While the income gap has shrunk significantly, having a husband around can definitely make the financial issues easier to manage; it is not always the case that two incomes are better than one. If a married couple is each making only a minimum wage income, which will be significantly less than a single mom who is, say, a physician.
Discipline factors
It used to be a quote that all stay-at-home married moms would shout at misbehaving children - "Wait until your father gets home!" This phrase struck fear into the hearts of many youngsters, as they knew their fathers were the disciplinarians of the household. Both parents are more involved these days and with this comes potential arguments in respect to each parent's feelings.
Single moms may have to take care of all the disciplinary actions themselves, but at least they do not have to explain to another parent why they decided to take a certain parenting stance. Single moms are free to be over indulgent or strict and the only complaining to be potentially heard is from the children.
Happiness factors
Married moms may have additional income and they may have additional help with the parenting, but some married moms do not feel this equates to being a happier person or a better parent because of those factors. Unhappy marriages make unhappy partners and that equals unhappy children. Just because a child is raised with both parents does not mean they are happy. Married moms who rate their marriage as good and meaningful have the happiest households. Single moms can likewise provide a very happy household as long as they themselves are happy.
Similarities and Differences
- Overall, it doesn't seem to matter much these days if a mom is married or single in order to raise happy, well-adjusted children.
- The commitment to responsible parenting and open-minded discipline options are the critical factors in raising children, so before worrying about getting married to have a child, spend some time making sure you are happy with yourself first!
